Joy in Fear

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Romans 15:13 (NIV)

Lord, I don’t want to die yet. If I must go through cancer, give me joy and strength.

I wrote those words just a few days before a dear friend sent me today’s verse.

She knew I needed joy and peace. I waited for a biopsy — scheduled on my son’s eighteenth birthday. Of course, my mind swirled with fear and what-ifs.

That biopsy revealed cancer, and I had some very difficult days.

Scans that led to more scans. Surgeries. And the lab work. Did I mention I’m afraid of hospitals?

Yet even in the fear, I saw God answer my prayer for joy and peace — in big and small ways.  

I found joy watching my son celebrate his birthday with friends.

I found peace in Christian music that kept my mind focused on God’s character.

I found comfort praying scripture back to Him — promises that reminded me who He is.

At first, I didn’t share my diagnosis. I didn’t want cancer to define me. And it seemed too surreal and heavy. When I finally did share, God met me again — this time through friends who surrounded me with love and strength.

Maybe you can relate to some of my prayers I cried through this season:

· Lord, replace my negative thoughts with truth. (Philippians. 4:8)

· Lord, I wait for your help. Fill my heart with greater joy. Let me lie down and sleep in peace — knowing You alone keep me safe. (Psalm 4:7-8)

· Lord, I don’t want to miss anything you’re showing me.

· Hold my hand, Lord. Be with me. Help me not to fear. (Isaiah 41:13)

May the God of hope fill you with the joy and peace that only He can give.

Stacy